Making Peace With Your Past

Sometimes it is not what is in front of you that is a road block to what you are pursing in your life but it is something in your rear view mirror. 

Although we can try, it is can very difficult to leave the past in the past. Our mind goes back and revisits the past and then we relive our mistakes, traumas, anger, and regrets over and over again.
While it is important to bring these up to the surface to work through them, once we do that, we have to let them go and leave them in the past.

The best way to do this is to train your mind to let the past stay in the past.

While you may not have control over thinking of something, you do have the choice not to dwell on it and let it take over your emotions.

Focus on your life now and look to your future!

Sometimes it may be troublesome to move on from your past because there is still something that you need to do to make amends before you can move on. Perhaps it is forgiving someone. It may be that you have not been able to let go of someone.

Whatever it is, ask yourself what might be holding you back. Acknowledge it. Confront want you truly believe that you need to do to move past it and do it.

Allow yourself to reflect at your life and circumstances of what you are going through. Try looking at it as a third party. What would you tell a close friend or family member to do if they asked you?

It is helpful to be aware and then to understand why you are having a difficult time letting go and moving on.  

Accept what was and is and tell yourself that - YOUR PAST DOES NOT DEFINE YOU!

Leave what you need to let go of in the past.

When it creeps back up, tell yourself, “I am past this. I have let this go! I am healed! I DO NOT AND WILL NOT dwell on it nor will I let it consume my emotions any longer.”

Then, concentrate on the here and now and what lies before you.

Journal your values and aspirations and drive forward without looking in your review mirror any more except to say, "I am moving forward and I do not need to dwell in my past any longer."

We all have a past. They are all different. Mine was painful due to multiple traumas. Then, I made some decisions in my life that I wish I had not made due to my pain. However, my pain, traumas, and my mistakes do not define me! 

Right now, visualize carrying around heavy stones with you as you do everything in your life (representing things that you need to let go of). That would be difficult to carry those and keep moving forward, right? Now visualize placing them in a row and using them as stepping stones to move forward in your life. 

LEARN from your past! Turn your mess into a message!

Then when your past calls again- tell yourself, "I don't need to answer that call as it has nothing new to say! "

Seek help and talk to someone if need be. There is a whole new life out there waiting for you!

an oldie but goodie

There is always hope! 

CLICK HERE For Living With Hope Counseling Facebook Page AND "LIKE" IT!
 



        
 By Diane Davidson Gammon MS
Clinical mental Health Counselor

Disclaimer- I am not a doctor and I am not giving out medical advice. My blogs are for information and inspirational purposes. Please consult your doctor before starting a new health regimen.

Diane Davidson Gammon Arnold MS is clinically supervised by Michael Loftis LCSW as she pursues  LPC-MHSP licensure

 Open Full-Time Days - Monday through Saturday
With Evening Appointments
615-556-8406
Email- Diane@LivingWithHopeCounseling.com

Sliding Scale Fee for Individual Counseling Sessions 

Free Support Groups for: Depression, Anxiety, Panic, Hopelessness, Trauma, PTSD, Abuse, and Grief and Loss (Including Miscarriage/ Stillbirth/ Infant loss)

 Have Hope! Renew Health! and...........

 
  

 

Loneliness- Tips That Can Help You Feel Better

Loneliness is a feeling. You can feel very lonely even while being with other people. On the flip side, you can feel great and not feel lonely even when you are alone. Thus, feeling lonely is a state of mind.

When you feel lonely, ask yourself why you are feeling this way. A lot of the time when a person feels lonely, it is because they have negative feelings about themselves or they are upset about something.

Further, it is easy to have feelings such as loneliness when we compare ourselves to other people and the lives that we believe they may have.  

Try not to compare your life to someone else’s life. Everyone has challenges in life. Some are just not as visible as others. 

When you feel lonely, it can often lead to feeling sad and depressed. When this happens, people often react by withdrawing even more from others and then they feel sorry for themselves.

So, it is important to ascertain why you feel lonely first of all. This can hep you to understand your feelings better. 

A good way to do this is to journal. 

Once you acknowledge why and what triggered your feelings of loneliness, tell yourself that you can change this feeling! 

First of all, change your thought process. Tell yourself that you will be okay and that there are ways to feel better.

Here are some suggestions to combat feeling lonely:

Positive self-talk
Staying active 

Volunteering

Join a class – (church, educational, hobbies, mental health, dance)

Join a group of some type (meet ups, support groups, self-help)

Get a pet

Build existing relationships in your life

List your passions and interests and start pursuing them

Talk to someone when you are feeling sad and lonely

Count your blessings

Being socially isolated is not healthy emotionally or physically. Be creative and put yourself out in the world. Even if you are not a friendly person and no matter your age, you can still find different ways to meet new people and to be more sociable!

GET UP, DRESS UP, SHOW UP, and smile at someone!! 

Work on improving your self-esteem and self-worth. Start with working on self-care. When you feel better about yourself then you will feel friendlier which will draw others to you. 

Also, remember that emotional pain is only temporary. Take a deep breath, get some sunshine, and make the decision to make a change. If you need help, please talk to someone!

Engage in activities that will promote your positive self-image and tell yourself that you can and will conquer these sad feelings! 

It all starts with you and your mind set. Change your attitude and then your actions.

If you know the Lord, you can also go to Him. Give Him your pain. He will give you peace and comfort. If you do not know the Lord, I want to encourage you to talk to someone who can help you to invite Him into your heart and life. 

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

An oldie but goodie



There is always hope! 

CLICK HERE For Living With Hope Counseling Facebook Page AND "LIKE" IT!
 


 By Diane Davidson
                                             Gammon M.S.
         Clinical Mental Health Counselor 

Disclaimer- I am not a doctor and I am not giving out medical advice. My blogs are for information and inspirational purposes. Please consult your doctor before starting a new health regimen.

Diane Davidson Gammon Arnold MS is clinically supervised by Michael Loftis LCSW as she pursues  LPC-MHSP licensure

 Open Full-Time Days - Monday through Saturday
With Evening Appointments
615-556-8406
Email- Diane@LivingWithHopeCounseling.com

Sliding Scale Fee for Individual Counseling Sessions 

Free Support Groups for: Depression, Anxiety, Panic, Hopelessness, Trauma, PTSD, Abuse, and Grief and Loss (Including Miscarriage/ Stillbirth/ Infant loss)

 Have Hope! Renew Health! and...........

 
  

 

Understanding Emotional Abuse

 

A victim of emotional abuse quite often doesn’t see the mistreatment as being abusive. 

Victims of abuse often demonstrate coping mechanisms of denial and they also minimize their abuse.

Emotional abuse can cause severe emotional trauma in victims such as depression, anxiety, and post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Here is a list of some behaviors that  constitutes emotional abuse:

1. When someone humiliates you, puts you down, or makes fun of you in front of other people.

2. When someone disregard your opinions, ideas, suggestions, or needs.


3. When someone accuses you of being “too sensitive” in order to deflect their abusive remarks.

5. When someone is controlling.

6.When you have to ask permission from this person.

7.When someone cuts down your dreams and goals.

8.When someone repeatedly points out your flaws. 

9. When someone accuses you of things that are not true.


10. When someone make excuses for their behavior, tries to blame others, and has difficulty apologizing.


11. They blame you for their problems, life difficulties, or for their unhappiness.

12. They call you names or curse at you.

13. They are emotionally distant or emotionally unavailable most of the time.

14. When someone resorts to pouting or withdrawal to get attention or to attain what they want.

15. They lack empathy or compassion.

16. They play the victim role and try to deflect blame to you rather than taking personal responsibility.

17. They disengage or use neglect or abandonment to punish or frighten you.

18. They do not notice or care about your feelings.

19. They withhold sex as a way to manipulate and control.

20. They invalidate or deny their emotionally abusive behavior when confronted.

21. They make threats to frighten or control you.

The first step for those being emotionally abused is recognizing it’s happening. 

If you recognize any of these signs of emotional abuse in a relationship that you are in, you need to be honest with yourself so you can regain power over your own life, stop the abuse, and begin to heal. 
 
The stress of emotional abuse will eventually catch up with you in the forms of illness, emotional trauma, depression, and/or anxiety. You simply can’t allow it to continue, even if it means ending the relationship. 

A counselor can help you navigate the pain and fears of leaving an abusive relationship and work with you to rebuild your self-esteem.

Reference: Live Bold and Bloom

Reach out for help and attend a free support group. 

Due to the 4th of July Holiday, we will be having our next support group on Tuesday, July 10th instead of the first Tuesday of the month.

Pre-registration and pre-screening is required. 

Text Diane at 615-556-8406 or email her at Diane@LivingWithHopeCounseling.com to register or for more information.

There is ALWAYS HOPE!



There is always hope! 

CLICK HERE For Living With Hope Counseling Facebook Page AND "LIKE" IT!
 


 By Diane Davidson
                               Gammon M.S.
         Clinical Mental Health Counselor 

Disclaimer- I am not a doctor and I am not giving out medical advice. My blogs are for information and inspirational purposes. Please consult your doctor before starting a new health regimen.

Diane Davidson Gammon Arnold MS is clinically supervised by Michael Loftis LCSW as she pursues  LPC-MHSP licensure

 Open Full-Time Days - Monday through Saturday
With Evening Appointments
615-556-8406
Email- Diane@LivingWithHopeCounseling.com

Sliding Scale Fee for Individual Counseling Sessions 

Free Support Groups for: Depression, Anxiety, Panic, Hopelessness, Trauma, PTSD, Abuse, and Grief and Loss (Including Miscarriage/ Stillbirth/ Infant loss)

 Have Hope! Renew Health! and...........

 
  

 

Hope In Dark Times

Are you having a difficult time coping with life right now?

I know that it can be difficult and that sometimes it feels like there is no hope in sight.

Hold on to the idea of having hope and of things getting better.

Try and do what you can with what you have control over and then let go of the rest.

Reach out to someone who you trust. Talk to someone. It helps to talk and share your feelings. 

Take that first step of getting out of the darkness by telling someone how you are having a difficult time. Do not keep it bottled up inside.

There is hope. There is help.

Free Depression/ Anxiety Support Group for adults of all ages

Due to the 4th of July Holiday, we will be having our next support group on Tuesday, July 10th instead of the first Tuesday of the month.

Pre-registration and pre-screening is required. 

Text Diane at 615-556-8406 or email her at Diane@LivingWithHopeCounseling.com to register or for more information.



There is always hope! 

CLICK HERE For Living With Hope Counseling Facebook Page AND "LIKE" IT!
 


 By Diane Davidson
                               Gammon M.S.
         Clinical Mental Health Counselor 

Disclaimer- I am not a doctor and I am not giving out medical advice. My blogs are for information and inspirational purposes. Please consult your doctor before starting a new health regimen.

Diane Davidson Gammon Arnold MS is clinically supervised by Michael Loftis LCSW as she pursues  LPC-MHSP licensure

 Open Full-Time Days - Monday through Saturday
With Evening Appointments
615-556-8406
Email- Diane@LivingWithHopeCounseling.com

Sliding Scale Fee for Individual Counseling Sessions 

Free Support Groups for: Depression, Anxiety, Panic, Hopelessness, Trauma, PTSD, Abuse, and Grief and Loss (Including Miscarriage/ Stillbirth/ Infant loss)

 Have Hope! Renew Health! and...........