Mother's Day- Turning a Painful Day for Some- Into a Treasure

I had a very loving and supportive mother growing up. I buried her 22 years ago this month. She died in my arms from pancreas cancer. We had only learned of her cancer one month prior. 

After she passed away, I used to hate Mother's day. It was just a painful reminder of my significant loss. 


In Loving Memory of My Mother, Darlene Kay Davidson

Even after I had children of my own, Mother's Day was extremely difficult on me because my mother had died. To be honest, I was on a pity party every year for years and I envied everyone that I saw at church on Mother's Day who were with their mothers.     

Then I decided to focus each year on being thankful that I was mother.  

Next, I decided to focus on the legacy that my mother left me in everything that she taught me about life.

She taught me to look for the good in everyone. She taught me to have a sense of humor. 

More than anything, she taught me to be true to myself and not to be concerned about other people's expectations of me. 

She taught me to answer to myself and to God. She taught me to live free of other's approvals on what they thought of me and how I choose to live my life. 

She wrote me a letter once emphasizing this wish for me and I quote, "If you want to get married barefoot in a macaroni and cheese patch, do it.”  

These thoughtful lessons still live in my heart today, daily.  

I know that some of you reading this right now are also hurting regarding Mothers Day like I did for so many years. Your mother may have passed away. Your mother may have never been in your life and you were raised by someone else. You may have been raised by numerous adults and moved from family to family. What ever your story and the circumstances regarding your pain, I know that it can be very hurtful.

I just want to encourage you to try to use this day as an opportunity to honor anyone who may have been a positive and loving parental role model in your life, no matter your age. Embrace the relationship that you had with them and how you were blessed by them. 

If your mother or someone who raised you is still alive and you have been distant with one another due to pride, I want to encourage you to forgive and reach out to them in love. 

Maybe you need to forgive someone who was suppose to be a mother figure to you and she was not the mother she should have been. You can forgive this person with love whether they are still on this earth or if they have passed on. 

Celebrate love and lessons learned! Be thankful for the inspiration that your mother or someone else has left as a treasured imprint in your heart and life and pass it on! 

This imprint from my mother is the following: 
I hope that it will inspire you to SHINE ON being YOU!

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:11-13

By Diane Gammon M.S. Clinical Mental Health Counselor

                                    Blog Website LivingWithHopeCounseling.com